Swing
Slinking across a dark room,
golden glints in amber hair.
Intense concentration
upon the swing of her hips,
the smooth way her legs move.
Carefree laughter,
wrapping herself around him,
who wants to kiss
that silky, freckled face.
Button nose.
Sensual, soft lips.
So alluring
I wrote that poem when I was in Grade 11. It was more of a wish than a reality. At 17, I wanted to feel sexy and beautiful, and more than anything, I wanted to be loved.
That was 20 years ago. And I still want those things. The difference is, that now I realize that feeling sexy and beautiful is up to me. And I am very lucky to be greatly loved by my husband of 11 years.
We have two young children and so feeling sexy is more of a challenge than ever. I am more often up to my elbows in dirty laundry than dirty negligees. Even beauty is hard to find when plucking your eyebrows needs to be scheduled.
But as I age, I understand more clearly what makes someone sexy. It can be their body, definitely. But a hot bod without thoughtfulness and kindness isn’t attractive. Sculpted abs don’t make someone a good partner. A certain BMI doesn’t ensure that someone is happy and confident and fun.
Sexy and beautiful comes from how you feel about yourself and your purpose. I feel I am worth being loved. I feel I deserve happiness and joy, and I want to bring those things into the lives of others. I know I am a great mom, a good teacher and a loving wife (although I could more patient in all these roles).
And so the extra weight that came with 2 babies, hypothyroidism and a love of all things sweet… it melts away when I remember who I am. That 17-year old girl had it right… so alluring.
iamsomeonesmother 